What is connection coaching?
I help people feel connected to themselves and their purpose. I work with people who are experiencing anxiety and feeling lost, perhaps because they are unsure of the direction their life is heading in, or because they are yearning to build a truer connection to themselves, longing to uncover their potential and perhaps also wanting to connect to their own spirituality, inspiring a sense of wonder and interconnectedness.
Maybe you aren’t sure where your life is going, you’re feeling lost and anxious and in need of some direction. You want to understand yourself better, what’s behind your thoughts and actions and what you truly want from life. Maybe you’re starting to realise that the job you’ve been doing for the last ten years isn’t your true calling, you’re feeling pushed into a corporate world that you can’t connect with and you want something more. Perhaps you feel there’s something missing in your social life as what you value has changed and you’re searching for your tribe, people you truly connect with on a deeper level. Maybe like me you’ve made the decision not to have children and now you’re examining your life all over again, looking for a clearer sense of purpose. Maybe you now have more time to dwell on the spiritual, but you aren’t yet sure what that means to you or how to connect to it.
I want to help you see your life differently. I want to help you see your potential and abilities so that you can live a full life every day. I want to help you overcome anxieties and insecurities and wake up to the wonder in the world that is all around you, that you are connected to because we are all connected to everything on this earth, not separate from it as we have so often been led to believe, but part of it. You will find that this knowledge of our interconnectedness can bring you true contentment.
I’ve been on my own long and twisting journey to overcome this kind of anxiety and to find my purpose in life and I believe that I’m in an excellent position to accompany you on your own path because I understand that instinctual feeling of knowing you’re not living your life in alignment with your hopes and dreams.
I can help people facing anxiety and insecurity by helping you to live in a more interconnected and fulfilling way. While I’m not a mental health professional, I firmly believe that leading a more connected life can help reduce anxiety and lead to a sense of happiness and peace. I have suffered from low-level anxiety my whole life and although I’ve been below the threshold for medication or formal treatment, I always felt that the underlying sense of dread and worry were impacting my ability to lead a rich, joyful and contented life. I have found that building connections to my authentic self and my purpose has led not only to increased mental wellbeing, but also to the right people coming into my life, nurturing a true sense of interconnectedness.
We are often frozen in a state of worry and anxiety, but instead of actually taking the time to think through what the causes of this are and what we can do to create change in our lives, we engage in various numbing processes which only serve to disconnect us further, such as hours spent on social media, filling our lives with ‘to do’ lists and constant busyness, drinking alcohol and indulging in unhealthy eating habits. In the coaching space you have the valuable gift of time to allow yourself to really think deeply, exploring behaviours, voicing feelings and untangling what’s going on, so that you can move past those worries or anxieties and become an active participant in your life. Becoming aware of what you want and the beliefs you have that are holding you back from that is the first step along the path. Coaching will help you to do that.
“Creativity is the power to connect the seemingly unconnected” - William Plomer.
This quote very much describes the magic of coaching but also our lives in general. Think you’re not creative? I assure you that you can create the life you want. You have all the tools available to you to connect to everything you need.
As we work through the programme of sessions (six are recommended at first), I can help you move past those feelings of frustration, disconnection, purposelessness, loneliness and anxiety. My sessions are always free-flowing and you, as the client, are in control of the direction we take. Often the tangents and diversions can be the most fertile areas for breakthroughs.
Some examples of how I’ve helped clients are:
I had a client who was struggling with her busy mind. She wanted to feel more present in the world rather than just living in her head but had tried everything that’s normally recommended, such as mindfulness apps and yoga. I helped her to move past preconceived ideas of what should work and the frustration she was feeling that it didn’t, which she found to be a great relief. Together we explored times when she had felt in the moment and what she had been doing. She found this new approach liberating and eventually took up running again as that was when she was able to be free of thoughts and feel in the moment.
I had a client who was feeling directionless and lost. She’s creative and was struggling to find her people and connect to what she felt she should be doing. We began to unpick all of these feelings and she eventually came to the realisation that underneath all the pressure she feels, she doesn’t want to be shoehorned onto a particular path and wants her life to be free flowing, while at the same time always moving forward. We built up a solid collection of things that she enjoys doing which connect her to her authentic self, which in turn makes her feel more able to interact with people from a genuine place, thus attracting the right kind of people to her and caring less about the judgment of others.
I also helped a client build her own ideal morning practice by first exploring what would work for her, namely what she would enjoy and what would make her feel good, as well as what was realistic. We explored what might disrupt her routine so that she could be prepared for that. By adding in the accountability of reporting back to me, she was confident she could form a new wellbeing habit which would help her begin her day from a more positive and mindful place.
How does it work?
So how can we build connection? When you work with me, we’ll explore the areas of concern in your life and look at where you feel that sense of connection is lacking. Although you may not initially be able to pinpoint it, it will become clear through our discussions.
We will then work to improve each area, using transformational coaching tools and techniques to develop personal practices and action steps, eventually bringing it all together to holistically improve your wellbeing.
We’ll build the foundations by really working to connect you back to yourself. Your authentic self may have got lost through years of performing various roles, living up to other people’s expectations, trying to fit in, comparing yourself to others and pressure from society or the media. You may have forgotten what’s really important to you, what makes you laugh out loud, what play means to you and what your vision for your future is.
Through thoughtful questioning and exploration, we’ll uncover what you value and see where you might be living out of alignment with that, we’ll explore what truly drives you, what you really want, what has stopped you moving forward before, what is causing the sense of overwhelm and anxiety and how can you be more present and get out of your head, as well as expanding outwards and asking how you could connect to community and what you could offer it.
If it’s a path you wish to explore, we can discuss what spirituality means to you and I can help you to develop your own personalised practice to connect you to that sense of a higher self and the divine, whatever that means to you. I can help you reconnect to the energies and yearly cycles that affect our daily lives so that you can embrace the connectivity of living in alignment with the world around you. We can also use guided visualisation to connect to your own inner wisdom. This will foster a sense of peace and faith in your intuition which, when such practices are done regularly, will become part of your everyday life.
As an example, my personal spiritual practice involves daily mediation (a habit which takes practise!) in which I tune into the energies around me, the higher power as I conceive it to be and the energy of the season we’re in. I give thanks by making offerings, sometimes as simple as a bit of bread outside, or some herbs. I celebrate the turning of the seasons and try to live my life in alignment with them, for example new projects are begun at Imbolc in February, balance in my life is assessed and strived for at the equinoxes and Winter Solstice is a time for reflection on the year just gone. I try to always be present to nature around me and let the magic and beauty of it inspire me. I have found that if I let the practice slip, I feel disconnected and anxious which proves to me how valuable it is for overall wellbeing. It’s important that any spiritual practice is personal - nothing will stick if you don’t enjoy it or get something from it - so we will take time to explore what spirituality means to you and what you hope to achieve from such a practice.
And there’s no need to go it alone!
I also run group sessions where we can explore these ways of connecting together. Sometimes we might work on a theme, for example at the seasonal festival of Imbolc/Candlemas in February, we might consider growth and what thought-seeds we are planting for the year ahead. At Samhain on 31st October, we might look at the transformative power of death, letting things go that no longer serve us so that we can move forward, like a snake shedding its skin.
I also intend to run larger more social-orientated gatherings (connection webs) to bring my clients together to form our own community, linked together by the journeys we are on, in the hope of sparking some interesting and fun conversations.
Take a look at the ‘Services’ section to see my various coaching offerings and consider what might work best for you.
The first step is a free discovery call which usually lasts between 30-45 minutes. In this call I’ll explain a bit more about the coaching process and ask you about what you want to work on. The coaching relationship is paramount, so it is only if we both think that we can work together that we will go ahead and schedule some sessions.